Unreasonable Adventures – Part Two Foreign Men in Flashy Boats

” LAX or Long Beach?”  Hoonie asks.

“Long Beach!” I tell her.

“There’s a flight leaving LaGuardia at 3:45….”


Next is a call to my fierce and fabulous friend Lita.  Originally from Vegas she was now living in South Pasadena.  “Lita Bug!!!  How are you?  What are you doing this weekend?”

“Nothing…  ARE YOU COMING DOWN!!!!?”

I had been playing with Lita for years!  She was one of the few people who didn’t need a logical reason to have fun.  She was game for every crazy idea I ever presented from the first week we lived together in Jackson Hole, Wyoming.  Our three month existence in Jackson:

Me -”Do you want to go find the hot springs and jump the fence??”

Lita – “Yeeesss!!”

Me -”Hey..Do you want to go see the Bar J Wranglers tonight?”

Lita  – “Yeaaaah”

Or my personal favorite.  “I challenge you to a race down the alpine slides?”

Lita – “You’re on!!!”

So at 3:45pm I was on my way to Long Beach.  Lita was waiting for me on the other side of the country with adventure in her eyes as usual.  It was late and she was starving so we went for food.  Usually Lita leads me to something Oriental and tonight was no exception.  In 20 minutes I was in a Vietnamese restaurant watching Asian soap opera on TV, drinking something that looked like it had been created by Dr Seuss.

We discuss potential options for play over the weekend.  Disneyland was an obvious suggestion, but it was Easter weekend and everyone and the entire family will be there so it would be packed.  Same with Magic Mountain and Knott’s Berry Farm.  We couldn’t come to a decision so we decided to decide in the morning.

Next morning we unanimously agree that important decisions cannot possibly be made on an empty stomach, nor under the pressure of undertaking food preparation.  We simply must go out to breakfast.   As we are waiting for our check, Lita’s phone rings:

“Hi! …Yeah… sounds great!   OK… bye.” she hangs up and looks at me.  ” Do you want to go to Catalina Island with two guys from Saudi Arabia on their boat?”


Thirty minutes later two guys pull up to her house.  “Hi!!  We’re Hashim and Amir.  We’re from Saudi Arabia. Don’t hold that against us.”

“Have you got a boat?  Let’s go!”

Seconds before their speedy arrival, I reminded Lita that one night stands were not something I did… no matter where they sailed me on that little boat.  She informed me that she had no intention of putting out either.  I asked, “Do they know this?…”


“Oh … OK…looks like we get to show they a genuine good time so give us a ride back tomorrow.”

Lita smiled, “If anyone can pull this off, we can.”

As we are sailing out of Newport enjoying the view on the front of the boat, my phone rings.  “Hello?”

It’s Burly.  “Hey Lynnette, what are you doing?”

“I’m on a boat headed out to Catalina Island.”

“Catalina Island?..  that’s in California.”


“You were in NEW YORK yesterday!!!”

“Yes, I was.”

“Only you!!”  I didn’t give her too many details.  I knew she wouldn’t lecture, but I didn’t want her to worry either.  There was a long pause and Burley quietly said, “Call me when it’s over so I know you’re OK.”   I agreed.

Oh the freedoms of a boat!  Catalina Island was a great getaway.  We had dinner and enjoyed the clubs that evening.  After a night of mild frivolity, we retired to the boat.  There were two beds down below and before these guys knew what happened, Lita and I had fallen asleep on one of them.

Game Over.

The next morning our two guys seemed a little put out, but Lita and I know well how to ignore adversity.  We had carefree smiles and started the harmless but comical mimicking of the ridiculous behaviors we had all had seen around town the previous evening.  Grand prize went to: “Hey…that’s my spot!”  As if anyone OWNS a bar stool!!

Within 20 minutes our guys were laughing with us and even making their own jokes!  I was so proud of them.  We had breakfast… the best almond buckwheat pancakes I’ve ever had, and rented golf carts to explore the Island.  I highly recommend a golf cart for any adult who is looking for a legitimate toy.  A few hours and a boat ride later we were back  on the mainland and saying goodbye.  We gave both of them big hugs with sincere thanks.  It was the best weekend we had experience in years.  They agreed! There was no disappointment, only a little surprise as they got in that really nice car and drove away with big smiles.

We watch the car turn the corner.  We both look at each other.

“Now what?”

“I’m hungry”

“Let’s eat!”

Categories: Uncategorized

Leave a Reply